Sickening Rollercoasters.

A girl living in a small town wondering what to do..everyday its the same routine...everyday is the same crap...wondering if there is something more for her out there. Can there be something better for her out there? Not knowing what life is about...everyday same old crap...She tries to forget it all but it slowly starts building up more and more suffocating her inside...slowly closing in on her...not knowing what to do anymore...She feels cold, lost, confused and hurt inside...wanting to just run...run from the pain and the crap but it seems to catch her no matter how fast she runs..not matter how fast she tries to run from it all. She wants to smile but she can't bring herself to smile...when she does put on a smile is it real? Is she really happy? Does she feel different inside from what she appears to be on the outside? She wants to be happy...it feels like a sickening roller coaster ...even though she has her seat belt fastened tightly she feels sick and unsafe. She wonders if someday everything will truly be fine someday. She sometimes wants to give up and cry when her world is coming down...But others tell her to be strong and keep her head up because she is special...she's truly a unique person inside and out...but sometimes she herself doesn't believe it...even though she wants to..she wants everything to be fine..she keeps hoping and wishing for this to become reality.